bowling

 

on a lighter note from the last post, we went bowling! here's the thing about being three: yeah, it's rough behavior-wise, but he's finally old enough to fully participate in so many things and he's actually pretty fun and funny as an individual.

this was his second time bowling but really his first ever sending a ball down the lane. he was in heaven! it was a spur-of-the-moment adventure and being close to bedtime, we only got one game in. he could have bowled for hours, though. 

 

 his bowling technique was to take a running start, pause for a full stop at the lane, and roll the bowl from over his hip down to the pins. this resulted in sloooow motion excitement over which pins might get knocked down (thank goodness for bumpers). but each time a few went down he jumped for joy and danced to the loud music.

he was really good about understanding turns and letting us bowl on our own. he was careful and helpful when the balls came back and cheered us on when we knocked pins down. i caught him rubbing his hands over the air dryer before picking his ball up to bowl. he loved his little toddler bowling shoes (um, yeah, cutest ever) and was thrilled to see the black lights in action. we haven't done a lot of family outings like this and it's exciting to think about his age lending to a new interest in participating and enjoying adventures.

also, bowling + pregnant is funny. and with the number of tweens and teens there, i'm betting my gait and general appearance while bowling provided a bit of a reminder on the realities of pregnancy. it didn't help that i wore a white shirt. it seems black lights paired with a giant white bump protruding from my midsection is really hard to ignore.

terrible threes

this face, terrible? i know it seems impossible but three is so far less rewarding than the years prior. with age comes the desire for independence and autonomy, but much to his dismay, i seem to squash his every free whim.

two was hard, yes. one was also hard. it's all hard. but my patience for three is really thin. his outbursts and disappointments with daily life begin at waking and last until into bedtime. some days he'd prefer to not take his soaked nighttime diaper off in the morning. the battle of wills over this is worth me fighting because his PJs are likely wet and he's day time potty trained, so no more diapers. his insane screams at 7:15am and kicking legs falling over the edge of the changing station? so not the way i want to start my day. does he want puffins and milk? yes. NO! but yes, too. can he watch the same episode of fireman sam three times in a row? when i say no and suggest an alternative it's a meltdown of epic proportion, similar to if he were being burned over coals. this goes on through the day. eating, getting dressed, using the potty. anything he doesn't want to do, he bolts and hides or cries when "forced". the things he wants? "please? but i want to! please! please mommy!" i'm saying no because i mean no, so yeah, NO. it's impossible to decide what's worth fighting, what isn't a big deal, when to ignore, and when to engage.

we've been trying to see if timeouts work better than removing items or activities or vice versa. when we do our 123 magic system, we get to 3 and head for time out. he goes limp, starts sobbing/screaming, and pleads "but i want to be good!". (yeah, i wanted that, too. remember when i warned you at 1 and 2?) when he treats his things poorly we take them away, putting them up for later when he can try again to treat them nicely. when we're out and time outs don't work (he doesn't sit still in a one place, our timeouts at home result in time spent in his room with the door closed but with access to his things), we take activites he enjoys away from him. i hate this. "bad" behavior/poor decision making on his part leads to no afternoon movie or no story time before heading to bed. it feels awful to take these things and i don't even know if it works.

i find myself being very short with him and unable to figure out how to cut him some three year old slack. when he isn't being a terror, he is super cute and lovely. but even then, he is inquisitive and demanding of my time. i am 27 weeks pregnant. i just don't have it in me to answer every why? and what?, color or play exactly this way or that, and watch over every minute detail of his day. that whole "cherish this time, it will pass so quickly" is true but it's impossible to do all day, every day. i'm trying to find it in me. to remind myself that he wants me now, even though he might not need me in the way he did when he was younger, and that's important. i just wish we could both enjoy him being three a little bit more.

i talked to my girlfriends today about wanting to miss finn. being at home with him almost 100% of the time means i have no chance to really feel a longing for him. i experience his hourly tantrums and i don't get time off. of course, i am lucky to see him all of the time and to help shape his life (by his current account, "crushing his dreams"). but that "distance makes the heart grow fonder" stuff has an appeal. and i'm not talking about a trip to target for errands. that helps, but an hour of picking up toilet paper rolls, kid toothpaste, and other random household goods does not make me miss finn much. i don't know what works, but i feel like i need some away time to remember how wonderful he is and maybe forget just a tiny bit of all of the current drama he exudes. people don't call and tell you what a terror your kid is while you are away. they point out the cute things and gloss over everything else and then you remember all of those good things, want to experience them first-hand again, and await the reunion with excitement. with another baby on the way, i don't see this away time happening all that soon, but a mom can dream, right? in the mean time, i'll stick to figuring out what i can do to ease the pressures of being three (for me and for finn).

finn's 3rd birthday

we celebrated finley's third birthday a few weekends ago and his party was so much fun. because he's three and his preferences change on a whim, i didn't ask him what he might want for a theme. i picked construction because i knew he'd like it and it was easy!

we decorated the night before while he was asleep and when he woke up he toured the house and said "i'm so impressed by this place!". sometimes i think i'm just doing this stuff for me, but he loved it.

 

i designed the invites trying to bridge the gap between "all boy" and my own style. all of the printables had the same theme (favor tags, flag banners, cake toppers, food labels) and the color scheme of yellow and orange was easy to carry throughout the party.  i bought large disposable roasting pans and filled them with sand and construction trucks for a little indoor digging station and provided each child with a construction hat. we didn't have any games or activities outside of "play in the dirt" and "take out all of finn's toys", but toddlers and preschoolers don't need more than that to have a good time!

 

the food was simple - basically what a construction worker might bring in their old fashioned metal lunch pail (they still do that, right?!). we had sandwich triangles, carrots sticks/dips, orange wedges, bunny cracker mix, cheese balls and pirate booty. water and lemonade (plus beer, because what 11 am kids party doesn't require cold brews?) were the drink choices and i was happy when my mom already had the sport drink dispenser to balance out the glass pitcher. at the dessert table, the main event was chocolate cake but it might have been out shined by the dirt cups. this was a must for me (and maaaybe why i picked the theme in the first place). i LOVE dirt "cake" so much and i haven't met very many people who disagree. we also had a selection of orange and yellow candies.

the kids had a great time playing and helped finn during present opening by bringing gifts to him. it was chaotic and hilarious and really sweet. we sang him happy birthday as we watched him blow out three candles and i didn't even cry! 

he still asks about his party and is ready for the next one. he's planned it for next week (every week, it's always next week). too bad birthdays only come once a year :)

finley is three!

 

my sweet boy turned three. it's hard to believe, as it has every year, that he could be another year older. but there is no mistaking that he is a little boy now. not a baby, not a toddler, but a full on kid. he hilarious and adorable, with so much personality.

 

he is so verbal now and i often have no idea where he comes up with the things he says. when he woke up for his birthday party last weekend he looked around at the decorations and said "i'm so impressed by this place!" i see no signs of speech delay in him anymore and it's hard to imagine that he had any difficulty at all.

 

for personal memory's sake, he loves to eat yogurt, applesauce, and pretzels. he will try most foods and he eats what we eat for all meals. he has oatmeal just about every morning for breakfast and gets sad if i offer him homemade waffles or pancakes. he can't stand certain textures (mainly vegetables) and gags on foods like cream of wheat, mashed/baked/boiled potatoes, roasted root veggies. he's kind of picky but i'm guessing it's more about control over actual preferences.

his favorite toys are matchbox cars, construction trucks, and trains. he loves to read books, puts together puzzles (35-60 piece ones for 4 yr olds), and enjoys coloring with crayons or markers. he spends his days jumping around with unlimited energy, playing with every toy he might see, and watching cartoons (caillou remains a favorite) and movies (he loves the little rascals, the lorax, and despicable me).

he takes an afternoon nap between 1:30pm and 5pm and goes to bed at 8:30pm, which he has for most of his life. we just got him a light up alarm clock that turns green when it's time to get up. i set that for 7:15 and i think he'll adjust to it and helps us all get on a schedule (just before the baby comes to change everything!). he is day time potty trained and is no longer in diapers except at nap and night time. 

he is kind and thoughtful and very aware of other peoples' feelings. he is frequently naughty and terrible twos seem to be leading right into troublesome threes. this whole parenting thing is hard because you never quite catch up. as soon as i figure out how to help him be nice and make good decisions, to try and understand why he gets upset or to play with him just how he likes...he goes and changes and i'm left to figure out what to do next. but that's what we sign up for and why it's so exciting. even though i'd like to stop time and savor him as he is now (as i have all of his life), i look forward to seeing how he grows this year. it's a big year for my baby, who will become a big brother and play a whole new role in our family. with tears in my eyes, i'm looking forward to three.

a good reading spot?

i found finn in a new reading spot the other day and couldn't resist snapping a few photos. after our trip to the library for new books, he unloaded them one by one behind the couch and paged through each one. he didn't ask me to read to him, he didn't call out for me to come see.

these little moments are my favorite :)

almost three

...my baby boy, who will not be the "baby" very soon is already not really a baby. i've mentioned this...right? he is three in just two weeks and i'm finding that amazingly hard to believe. i've been reading back over my pregnancy posts with him to compare to round two and ugh...i was just pregnant!

we've been battling "the sick" around these parts and the days stuck inside have been wearing me out. why do people not mention almost three year olds are balls of non-stop energy? oh, they do? it seems unfair that sick children do not sleep great at night (i'm not blaming finn..he couldn't breathe through his nose and was vomiting) and remain sick and snotty all day, yet have the ability to bounce around for hours without seeming all that tired. meanwhile, the parents lose sleep at night, fall sick with the same symptoms and can think of nothing more to do all day than to curl up in a ball and rest. rest, sick child!

today, day 5 (or 6?) of germfest, has finn on the upswing. i'm not quite there yet but his adorable spirit has kept me going. we're working hard on manners and potty training and there have been quite a few ups and downs. but today he's blown me away. he does want a lot of attention (you play dis wif me? you build dese for me? you help me pease? every 3 minutes even i i am already playing/helping/building) and that's tiring for someone (me) who wants to sit on the couch and just be sick and 22 weeks pregnant. but he makes it worth my while by proving he is listening and learning. "mommy, may i have some kefir, pease?" grants him a cup of kefir for snack because i can't resist those manners. nicely walking the dogs to the mailbox to pop the grandparent valentines in the mail granted a few giant splashes through the puddles. and i didn't even get mad when he sat down (but, why?!). running off to potty by himself four times, not an accident to speak of and (tmi) proclaiming his excitement over both pee and poop on that last visit to the little potty grants him a sticker on his chart and his hand.

 yes, at almost three he is self-centered. "i want..." is the first thing out of his mouth 500 times a day. but we follow it with 'may i/would you/etc., please and thank you'. he wants everything his way and playing with him isn't all that fun or rewarding - it's impossible to play the "right" way. but he's learning to share, take turns, and play pretend. and most importantly, he's eager to please and hear praise. he gets potty training and we even venture out without diapers. we're talking with him about moving to his big bed. we ask him to bring his dishes to the dishwasher. he gets his own drink cups from the fridge. so much independence coupled with so much neediness...a balance i guess!

still allergic

i may have mentioned a long time ago that finn had a pretty severe reaction to mustard around 14 months. his face was covered in hives and his eyes started to swell. we took him to get tested and while his blood test came back negative, the allergist warned that he may have been too young to get good test results on this sort of allergy. a few weeks later he touched a chicken salad with mustard in it...just one finger...and then he touched his face. within a minute he had a red, splotchy hive in the shape of his finger.

since then we have avoided any sort of mustard. it's a pretty easy allergy to deal with because there isn't a lot of hidden mustard. we avoid lots of pot luck style salads at gatherings and skip using it in family recipes (much to our dismay - we love mustard!!). we have epi pens and benadryl and aside from the few times we've administered benadryl, we haven't had any scares. in fact, we even thought he probably had outgrown it by now.

but last week we were out for sushi and finn had some spicy california rolls. i noticed his lips swelling a bit and his cheeks and chin had hives. i did a make-shift allergy test by putting wasabi paste on one cheek and the spicy sauce on the other. sure enough, the spicy sauce caused a reaction. i could only assume there was some sort of mustard in it as everything else in the roll he'd had before without issue. the reaction went away but i made him another appointment to be rechecked.

today he had the back skin test and sure enough, he reacted to the mustard sample. the hive wasn't as big as the control positive, but it measured large enough to be a legit allergy. people have a hard time believing a mustard allergy and now i can tell them for sure that he is currently allergic via a skin test. we'll follow up with a blood test this week and go from there. he'll be rechecked yearly and the dr. thinks he may still out grow it.

for now, we'll hold the mustard and continue informing people that yes, he does have this allergy. yes, it is real. it surprises me how many people act like i'm making it up!

reading

finn has always liked to read. we've been reading books to him since he was born and it's one of his favorite things to do now. in an average day we'll read 10+ books, a habit that is helped by almost weekly trips to the library. 

for all of that reading, he has never been into "reading aloud" by himself. he loves to page through books and look at the pictures, but he has never pretended to read (as a baby/pre-words) nor will he recite any parts of books on his own.

i know he knows the words to many of his favorites. if i pause while reading to him, he will chime in with the proper words. similar to how he resisted speaking in general or shying away from tasks in which he was not totally sure of himself, he gets nervous and shuts down when i asks him to read to me. since i don't want reading to become a burden for him, i have never pushed it.

a few days ago he blew me away by reading an entire book, out loud, to me. after taking these pictures to remember this time when he flips through books (and looks adorable!), i started to get ready for our errands. he sat reading a short, simple book and i asked him if he'd tell me the story. typically this results in a whiny "no, no you read dis book to me.", but instead he started on the first page and said "sometimes you are happy"..."sometimes you are sad"... and until the end he remembered all of the lines matched with the pictures on the pages. on the last page he made up some silly ending because he's squirelly like that.

 

it was so sweet to see him recite a story using the pictures as a guide for the memorized words. i just cross my fingers that he'll continue to love books as much as i do (and his dad, whose bookshelves dominate the office) and that we'll continue to read to each other.

(in non-finn news, my gender ultrasound is tomorrow...boy or girl this time??!)

mine only for now

when carrying a baby, that baby seems like it's all mine. i don't have to share it with the world and no one else gets to experience that individual baby growing like i do. it changes a little bit when the baby is born, but still. the workload, the largest share of love, the one-on-one time is all mine (well, ours, husband too!). and even though finley is almost three, i still think of him as an extension of me.

finn has croup right now and we let him sleep in our bed to monitor his breathing. we don't bed share and never have, so it's actually pretty sweet to sleep next to that warm little body, all wiggly and coughy. since our bed only seems big enough for one pregnant person and one other person, husband slept on the couch. so, finn was all mine. i have never gotten sleeping shots of him as he is typically a light sleeper and wakes up when his door is opened. i took advantage of the closeness and got a few treasured moments.

during the day while he lounges on the couch asking me to lay with him...again he is mine. i take that time to look at his face. his little chapped lips and his red eyes from the tears that well up during his coughing fits. i touch his pink cheeks and see his little teeth while he breathes with a tiny open mouth. i twist his curls and rub his soft back and i take all of him in.

today i looked at his palms. i wanted to see his tiny fingerprints (since my second baby is currently forming theirs). right now, these seem like my finger prints. not my own, but he doesn't know what they are and he doesn't think about them or use them, so they seem like mine. the pattern is clean and perfect, still fresh despite a few years of use. i can hold his little hands and look at them whenever i want.

but later (and yes, even now, technically) they will be his. he will use them for his own identification. they are his hands and i won't get to see them everyday, hold them and look at the swirls. they will become weathered with his life and not mine. i am watching him become his own person and each little milestone allows him to become more independent and free. less mine.

santa knows me

christmas is really magical to me and i've been so excited to introduce all of the wonder to finley in traditions and memories. we have three christmas trees, we do elf on the shelf, we have chocolate advent calendars, and we talk about santa and wait for his big night on christmas eve. through it all, i try to remind finley of the magic that is giving and that as fun as it is to get presents, it is wonderful to give gifts and show others kindness during the season (and obviously, year round).



to me, santa is such a wonderful concept. i love everything about santa and it seems finley is at the age where he does, too. we took him to see santa at our Y and he could hardly contain himself. instead of being shy or nervous he walked right up and let santa place him right on his lap. he smiled and looked right at santa, answering that he was a good boy (or girl, since santa had a hard time with this...). and he expertly delivered his gift list as he has been for days: "teddy bears, planes, trains, trucks, cars". he didn't want to leave and his sparkling eyes were fixated on that jolly old man.

tonight in preparation of riding chicago's "holiday express", the santa train, i played him a video we created online. you can input your child's name and some details and santa delivers a tailored message to your little one. we did this last year and finn enjoyed it then, but he was amazed this year. he saw his picture on santa's "finley" book (that's me!) and he was so excited to get a peak into the toy workshop.

he asked me to watch it again, so we did. a minute or so into it, again with his twinkling eyes watching santa with wonder, he softly said, "santa knows me". and it took everything in me not to scoop that precious boy up and hug him, teary eyed and happy over the magic of the season. "santa knows me."

we waited for over 20 minutes to ride the holiday express and when it finally arrived, finn was ecstatic. the train is decorated with lights and garland and santa's elves hand out candy canes upon entering. when we eventually hopped off to switch trains, we got to see santa as he was whisked off via train (he rides outside on a flat car). as we waited (and waited) for the next train, we were treated to a round trip view of santa's train. at our stop, finn was able to walk right up to santa, where he waved and said hello. santa looked right at him and chatted. finn was so proud when santa said, " i like your hat!" (a new red one) and when he said "i'll see you soon", i know finn believed it.

4th of july

we celebrated the 4th up north, without electricity after the storm. it didn't keep us from doing a few fireworks and some sparklers.

finn was actually a bit more scared this year than last year. (speaking of last year, did you click that link? who is that baby?!) maybe he's more aware of the potential danger involved when sparks fly around near his hands. but he still tried them out and watched our little fireworks show with excitement

 

 

happy (belated) 4th of july!

summer catch up: storms and fun

in july we went to minnesota to spend some time up north at the cabin. instead of a relaxing time, we were hit with a huge storm, 90mph winds, and hundreds of trees down blocking our way out from the cabin and cutting the electricity.we spent the time being exceptionally hot, taking baths in the lake, eating meals from the grill or fire, and cleaning up after the storm. thank goodness for a generator a few days in - we had a fridge and a few necessities plugged it occasionally.

finn didn't have much clean up duty, so he spent the time being two. getting sweaty and dirty, playing with toys, and just generally enjoying freedom in the summer. he was perpetually dirty and covered in large bug bites. it was as classic as it gets.

one of his favorite people, uncle nicky, read him books and gave him pony rides. i'm not sure uncle nicky knows, but finn says "nicky love me" at night before bed and asks to see him often. i love this picture because it looks just like it was: a hot summer day, too many feet and bodies in front of a single fan, and a toddler in a diaper being read his favorite story.

finn's current favorite food is yogurt. it's also his favorite outfit and color. if you ask him what you should wear in the morning, he'll tell you yogurt. i haven't braved the world in my yogurt suit yet, but i'll let you know if i do.

we had to collect water to use the toilet and do the dishes (boiled in an electric kettle). finn was most helpful at the task!

laundry on the line, buckets in hand, dogs in tow. a real break from life and while there was lots of work, we were able to connect with each other and make the best of a crazy situation. i'm not sure finley will remember this summer, but he still talks about the rain and wind making the trees fall down. i'm hoping memories like these are frequent (not so much the stranded without electricity, but the bonding and time up north).

summer catch up: father's day outing

oh june. i'm sorry i all but glossed over you (and july and most of august). i have yet to catch up on personal photos from the summer months but am doing my best to keep afloat. i want to keep track of our time here on the blog so here's a father's day wrap up post. (don't mind the random editing. personal photos are just for me!)

we took finley miniature golfing for the first time. taking a two year old mini golfing is a ridiculous idea, of course. he was pretty into it, though, and we had a good time.

he got to pick his own ball color and had a golf club just his size. his swing left a bit to be desired, but it was adorable to watch him aim, swing, miss, and try again.

the golf course was made for children and had slides, tubes and other kid-friendly features on each hole, so when he wasn't golfing he had other things to do. and he enjoyed hitting all of our golf balls into the hole. we'll have to teach him a bit of course etiquette.

these two are best friends. they butt heads a bit (but what two year old doesn't) but their relationship is so great. finn loves when his daddy comes home every day after work and can't wait to get outside and play football, soccer ball, or baseball. i'm not sure we'll be adding golf anytime soon (unless finn's grandpa has a say...) but he seemed to love to swing the club around.

we finished the day at one of our favorite south indian restaurants and ate way more than we should have. finn doesn't like much indian food, but we keep feeding it to him (like everything else) so that hopefully he'll like it eventually.

ice cream sandwich

i am well over a month behind on uploading and editing images from the summer. we've been traveling and enjoying our time and i've been taking pictures to remember finley's 3rd summer. just a quick post here of him enjoying his very first ice cream sandwich.

while i tend to keep his meals healthy and "balanced", i don't mind him having treats. especially those that create summer memories and evoke strong sentimental feelings of my own childhood. that means stopping at a DQ whenever i see one in the summer (we don't have one near, so i often get soft serve dip cone cravings). or, enjoying freeze pops wrapped in a paper towel. and, trying out new summer delights wearing nothing but swim gear.



he of course loved it. they should make vegetable ice cream sandwiched in flax seed chocolate cookies. i'd probably let him have that every day ;) instead, i bought some "bomb pop" star shaped popsicle molds. the first batch was mango blended in plain kefir, a layer of frozen berries, and strawberries blended in yogurt. i'm on the hunt for more fun recipes because he is all about the summer treats now!

father's day 2012

today was mr. h3b's 3rd father's day. finley learned to say "hoppy fater's daaey" just before dad woke up. it wasn't remarkably different than other weekends for us, but i tried to make it special in little ways. we woke up and did all of the prep this morning. every year we make a card for dad with a black ink foot print. i can't do it in advance because he'll see the ink stain and know...so to "surprise" him we do it the morning of. finley's foot is so much bigger. between year 1 and year 2 there is growth, yes. but this year? it's like a kid foot. finley decorated the paper bag wrapping paper with his crayon art. he learned to make "circles" for the occasion and spent some time scribbling away. he's been in love with "markers" (what he calls all coloring tools) and we color daily. as a treat, i let him use scissors. he said the word "cut" without prompting and my heart swelled with pride. this boy is learning every day. side note: i'm not sure what he's doing in the picture here, but his inquisitive little brain is up to something. also note the bruised and scuffed legs contrasting the melon painted big toes. he insists on getting his toenails painted and on occasion we do them. he's not patient so this last time i limited it to big toes only to avoid melon stained furniture. back to father's day. i made omelets and toast (at husband's request) and after breakfast we headed out to the beach. finn could spend hours at the beach with his daddy. dad doesn't mind standing in the cold water, fetching rocks, and wandering off to find seagulls. (not that i mind, but that water is cold!). in true form, finn threw a tantrum and sobbed the entire walk of the beach when it was time to head in for lunch and nap time. we spent the rest of the evening mini golfing (finn's first time - pictures to come) and enjoying a feast of south indian food at one of our favorite restaurants. finn is lucky to have a daddy that watches him play, teaches him new things (like hitting a "ball with a stick") and exposes him to foods and cultures outside of our bubble. he doesn't need lots of things (which he has), mostly just time and love (which he gets). we finished up with a trip to a local food market to stock up on fresh, cheap produce (7ft of sugar cane for $2 should fuel my mojito appetite). it was a simple day full of the things that matter. i'm so thankful to watch my son watch his daddy. he's got a great role model and friend and i'm excited to watch their relationship grow. as soon as we get out of the tantrum stage i bet it's going to be so sweet ;)